No news is…?

I’ve never been able to work out if I’m an optimist or a pessimist. Is the glass half full, or half empty? I joking reply – ‘more to the point, who’s round is it?’

I joke in response to the question, to avoid the question – as I still can’t answer it… There’s something in there, but I wish there was more, but thankful that it’s not empty.

I must to some degree be an optimist, as I wouldn’t write if I weren’t. Why waste my time if I thought that no one would produce my work? But I must be a pessimist, as if I see an opportunity, I more often than not say that it is too good to be true.

Why raise this today? It’s that dreaded day – the shortlist for Channel 4’s, The Play’s the Thing.

No mail, no phone calls, no emails. It wasn’t me then.

Did I think that I had a chance? We’re back to the half full or half empty thing again. Yeah, I thought I had a chance – I believe in my work, I believe in my passion, I believe that I could have made a forceful competitor. But then… No, they wanted someone new, someone to develop, someone without bad habits to correct…

Am I disappointed? Sure – but not really. I really wanted the break it could have given me. But would I have enjoyed the pressureof Reality TV? Don’t get me wrong, I would have done it – such is the belief I have in what I do… But would I have enjoyed it…?

At least now I have a new play to pitch. An artist director to contact without jeopardise my entry. A writing partner. New friends. New ideas. New inspiration.

I think that this weekend will be spent looking down avenues… It’s time to get out there again, write for my audience and pitch them anew.